Scrolling Past God
"Sometimes I'll just be sitting in the prayer room, scrolling on my phone, waiting for my shift to end." I appreciated the honesty from a full-time missionary at a 24/7 prayer house. I know I'm supposed to want God's presence, but sometimes even five minutes of prayer feels like too long.
Exodus 33:12-23
Moses said to the LORD, "Look, you keep telling me, 'Lead this people up,' but you have not let me know whom you will send along with me. And you have also said, 'I know you by name, and you have found my favor.' So now, if I really have found your favor, please teach me your ways, so that I may know you and go on finding favor with you. And consider that this nation is your own people." And he said, "My presence will go, and I will give you rest." Then Moses said to him, "If your presence does not go, do not bring us up from here. For how, then, will it be known that I have found favor with you—I and your people—unless you go with us? That is what sets us apart, me and your people, from every other people on the face of the earth." The LORD said to Moses, "This very thing you have spoken, I will do, because you have found favor with me and I know you by name." Then Moses said, "Please, let me see your glory." And he answered, "I will make all my goodness pass before you, and before your face I will call out my name, 'the LORD.' I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and I will show mercy to whom I will show mercy. But," he said, "you cannot see my face, for no human being sees me and lives." Then the LORD said, "Here is a place beside me. Stand here on the rock, and when my glory passes by, I will tuck you into a crack in the rock, and I will shield you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will lift my hand away, and you will see my back; but my face will not be seen."
At the burning bush, God comes down to Moses and promises to be with him and his people as he guides them to the promised land. But after the Israelites worshiped a golden calf, the Lord tells Moses that going forward, his angel will go before them (Exodus 32:34). Trust is broken, and it's a massive downgrade in their access to God. But Moses cannot bear the loss of being without God again. He had his own time of wandering in the wilderness with sheep. So Moses pleads with God. He knows that they cannot participate in God's mission without God's presence. He cannot imagine going forward without him. However, he also knows that the people have failed God. He has just smashed the tablets of stone and rallied the Levites to bring divine justice upon those in the camp who are out of control from their idol worship. So he does not ask God for anything because he or the people deserve it. Instead, he relies on God's character and promises. He reminds God that his reputation is on the line and that he has already pledged to act favorably toward Moses. He says it plainly: these are your people. The request is simple: even though we have broken the covenant we made with you, would you please keep it? God's answer is the turning point of Exodus: My presence will go with you. Instead of a strategy, he gives himself. Emboldened, Moses asks for more: to see God in all his glory. But this request is declined. It's not because God is rejecting him, but because he knows his holiness is an everlasting fire that would consume Moses and his sin. So he gently gives Moses what he can: his name, his goodness, and his closeness. Perhaps I don't want to be with God because I don't comprehend his greatness. If I grasped that he was too holy for me to see, I would crave to be with him all day long. Moses begged for what we scroll past because he had learned that he could not live life without him. But what God's hand had to hide from Moses is revealed in the hands of Jesus. Finally, we could see the face of God when it was united to our humanity. Even more, before Jesus sends his people out to start the church, he requires them to wait for the Spirit. It is only once God is with them that they can go into the world and say, "we have found favor with God."
Who in your life seems to want to be with God?
When you evaluate your spiritual life, how do you define 'success'?
What's the honest reason you don't want to spend time with God?
Before you start your day, set a timer for five minutes. Sit with your hands open before God. Pray, "God, I want to be in your presence today. Your grace and mercy are the reason I can keep going."